1. You’re starting to get carpal tunnel, and it ain’t from typing.
2. You can’t remember, why, oh why, you broke up with any of your exes.
3. A good Saturday night means a bottle of tequila and a fresh pack of batteries.
5. Did the janitor always look this good?
6. Your eye twitches every time you see a happy couple.
7. Your legs are so hairy you’re set for the winter.
8. When a guy hits on you, you ask him if it’s a practical joke.
9. Your neighbors refer to you as the ‘Lost Cause’, and knock on your door daily to make sure you haven’t died and the cats haven’t eaten you.
10. You sunk after a deep depression after Denny died on Grey’s Anatomy and are still working it out in therapy.
And the eleventh reason is…
11. You found your stash of condoms and they’ve expired… a year ago.